The motherhood paradox: From time out to time together - what mothers really want

702's Gugs Mhlungu spoke to resident human potential and parenting expert, Nikki Bush.

Listen to their conversation in the audio clip below.

"...be conscious of the fact that being a mum is one of the most incredible personal development adventures you will ever have... your children see you 360 degrees. They discover parts of you and help you to discover parts of you that you would not have discovered had you not become a mum."

- Nikki Bush, human potential and parenting expert

As we approach Mother's Day, Bush says motherhood should be seen as more than a to-do list, but a deeply personal journey.

In a recent blog post, Bush wrote about the mothering paradox - where she explained that one of the greatest gifts you can give a mother with children from preschool to high school is time out.

"Time out from chores, let mom stay in bed tomorrow, bring her breakfast in bed, let her read a book undisturbed for 20 or 30 minutes. Moms need to snatch time for themselves every now and again. Those are the kinds of things that we can do for moms of school-going children, is to give them some time without any demands and a day where they can forget about all the gazillion decisions and choices they have to make regarding their children."

- Nikki Bush, human potential and parenting expert

And for mothers with adult children, Bush says it's not about gifts but more about spending time together and little acts of service.

“I said to my son, go and wash my car, fill it with petrol, that would really fill my cup.”

 - Nikki Bush, human potential and parenting expert

"So, go figure the paradox. At different stages of our lives, we want different things as mothers." 

- Nikki Bush, human potential and parenting expert

Bush stresses that even though there are times when being a mother can feel like a thankless job, mothers should recognise their efforts and not rely on others for acknowledgement.

"...no one is ever going to be able to thank you enough for what you do and the time that you invest in your children over a lifetime. So don't just wait for the acknowledgement from other people. Learn how to ring your own bell too."

- Nikki Bush, human potential and parenting expert

Scroll up to listen to the full conversation