WATCH | SA men urged to challenge toxic circles: ‘Your silence is loud’

To effectively address gender-based violence, men must take accountability and actively address toxic behaviour in their circles.

In the latest Men’s Conference podcast episode with 947’s Thando Thabethe, the discussion highlights men’s relationships with women in South African society.

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Tumi Moutlana, creative director at VML South Africa, says violence is normalised from childhood through experiences like cat-calling and physical intimidation.

A sense of entitlement develops when boys aren’t corrected for aggressive behaviour, and this can escalate into adult relationships.

“We have got a violence issue in this country that we are not addressing, that spills over into intimate relationships, that translates into GBV, the murder of women and children.”

Thabethe adds: “I feel like men are quiet, we're not. Your silence is loud”.

Award-winning author Bongani Luvalo argues that society must invest in men's behavioural change.

“Discipline, order, and respect are something that you teach. Men, in their nature, in this context, are not only abusive and violent to women, but men are abusive and violent in general,” he says.

“Men must not be brought into these conversations as bystanders; we are part and parcel of this. We have got to own up. Human beings, whether men or women, don’t need to be treated like this,” Luvalo says.

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Moutlana adds: “It starts with every man in their immediate circle of influence addressing any toxic male behaviour that springs up. It is your responsibility as a man in your circles to address the men who are out of line.”

To watch Luvalo and Moutlana in conversation with 947’s Drive with Thando, click below: