Understanding the concept of 'Mother Hunger': how lack of nurturing creates a lasting void

Relebogile Mabotja speaks with Adele Pillay, Author and Child Trauma Expert

Listen below.

Mothers are supposed to be a source of unconditional love, nurturing and support.

However, some people lack that bond and long for nurturing, protection, and guidance.

Kelly MacDonald coined the term ‘Mother Hunger’ to describe the unmet need for maternal love and nurturing.

It stems from an incomplete or lacking mother-child bond in early development. 

This happens when a mother is emotionally unavailable or inconsistent with her children when they are young.

People suffering from Mother Hunger as adults might struggle with low self-worth and self-compassion, fear of abandonment and attachment issues.

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They may also constantly seek validation or approval from other people.

“There is a sense that you have a void. There is isolation, anxiety, and a lot of fear.”

- Adele Pillay, Author and Child Trauma Expert 

Pillay says that some mothers will not give their children the love and nurturing they need because they did not receive that care when they were younger.

“What was done to you, you will do to another.”

- Adele Pillay, Author and Child Trauma Expert 

Scroll up to the audio player to listen to the interview.